What do you think?

This is the first paragraph from a story I'm writing.


As I have done on many such mornings, I twitched aside the curtains and surveyed the panoramic view my seventh-floor window offered. The girl was there again, a dependable Ra who ushered in the sun. She stood outside the building at a flower stand that had been set up overnight. It was not one of the more pompous ones, with each breed and family organized into neat castes. Here the plants were flung together in promiscuous abandon, with tulips married to roses and hyacinths necking with cornflowers in the breeze. She eyed the selection as children do in candy shops, and finally laid a gloved hand on a basket of lilies. The jackal-faced clerk nodded and took her money. The girl then turned and entered a taxi, which slid like a stick of butter over a hill, settling among the glossy scarabs that were gathering outside a cemetery.

What do you think?
you obviously have no idea how to write decent literature.





with that much writing already done the cannibals should have eaten her by now!
Reply:http://answers.yahoo.com/question/index;...
Reply:It's good, and I really like your similes--just makes ure your sentences aren't TOO rich!